Art Exhibits are delightful things. I acquired my taste for them very early. You see my father was a painter, and I used to study his pictures advertising Storz beer, which always depicted the most inspiring historical subjects with great wealth of color. Of course I am not versed in the philosophical aspects of art as are Prof. Alexander and Prof. Dann. But then who cares for that side of art who can really appreciate its emotional qualities without seeing them thru a film of glittering generalities and evanescent abstractions? So I went up there in the Library and looked around a while and I must say that I think there has been a wonderful advance in art along the lines of artistic framing. I was very much disappointed to find that Prof. Fling was not there, for from the strenuous measures which he takes to secure the

attendance of the students, I imagined he would bring his lunch and stay all day. Very interesting was the bust of Captain Halsey E. Yates done by his wife and exhibited in Hardy's hardware store. Due to the absence of glasses and mustache, the Cap looked rather young, but yet on the whole natural. I asked why Prof. Fogg was not there. and was told that he had been offended at the fact that there was no portrait of him on exhibition. This I thot rather surprising because he is so handsome a man. After pausing for some time in adoration before the painting of Helen Mitchell, I passed on and plunged into a cooling ocean scene, put on my overcoat to enjoy a chilly winter landscape, fell to nodding over a sleepy Nocturne, stripped coat and vest as I neared a "Day in June." "Venus de Milo" and the "Dying Gladiator" concluded my aesthetic orgy, and I passed forth. I have experienced no ill effects, except that I have been compelled to wear smoked glasses since that time.

Plea for the Defense

"Did you say, Professor Engberg, that I
   failed in every one?
Why I studied--really studied, days before
    exams "begun."
Missed a basketball informal and a rushing
    party, too.
Stayed at home from church on Sunday,
    and I think from Sunday School.

I know I wasn't keeping all my lessons up
   to "E."
Put an all-round college person was my standard, don't you see.
Why even "Profs" dislike a "dig," and scorn his fancy grades.
Now I went in for politics, athletics, and parades.

"I did a social 'stunt' or two, and made a classy "frat,"--
That is, until your slip arrived and knocked my hopes all flat.
Oh shades of Ebenezer! Will you tell me what to do!
I 'dassen't' write my Daddy, and I can't stay here with you.

"Oh can't you find it in your heart to let me try again?
I think I've changed my views about an all-round college man.
I think I'd take to learning--feel it coming on, in fact.
Alas! Your kindly eye grows cold. I weep for that I lacked."

Inseparables

Vern Bates and Graft.
Rhetoric Department and Red Ink.
Mary Robbins and the D. Us.
Claudie Mitchell and the big "I."
Prof. Engberg and Flunkers.
T. N. E. and the Pan-Hel.
Alpha Phis and the Kap Sigs.
Lela Perry and her Smile.
Dramatic Club and the Temple Theatre.
Mildred Bevins and Clarence Clark.
Dale Boyles and His Policy.

Society Fussers and Dad's Money.
Phi Kappa Psi and her Pledges.
Kappas and Phi Delt formal bids.
Beta Theta Pi and Phi Beta Kappa.