"Kappa Alpha Theta--Make good
housewives. Noted for their talent, rather
than their beauty."
"Sigma Chi--Members of the Anti-Saloon
league. Recently entertained for Carrie
Nation."
"Alpha Tau Omega-Famous only for their
grub. Would be ruined if the price of food
should rise."
"Delta Upsilon--We have no secrets. Our
retreats open to all bill collectors.
"Delta Tau Delta--Guardians of Tige.
Prefer dog fights to formal parties
despite the fact they own thirteen dress
suits."
"Kappa Sigma--Late to bed and late to
rise
Shrinks
the brain from its normal size."
"Sigma Nu--The first fraternity in the
University to found a home for
orphans."
"Beta Theta Pi--Youth, dreams of luxury
and ease, a Baird's manual for a
foot-stool."
"Alpha Omicron Pi--Memories of
Childhood days. Comic vaudeville. every
open Sunday."
"Delta Gamma--Before making application
for admission must present a certified
copy of the Family Tree."
"Kappa Kappa Gamma--Rich, Refined.
Reserved? (In) (Ex) elusive? Sigma Chi
affiliations preferred.
Name--H. B. Alexander.
How Spent Childhood--Dressing
dolls.
First Act of Notoriety--joining
the Church.
How Acquired Fame--Falling in
love.
Self Estimate--I'm a great
pessimist.
What Others Say--"Crank."
Deficiency--Boston Manners.
Suggested Epitaph
He had no fortune, friends or
fame
That did not
matter much, O, no!
It killed him just to think he
had
No picture in the
Sombrero.
